STUDIES SHOW: CIGARETTES CAUSE CORPORATE DIVERSITY!

Just when Philip Morris had grown more corporately responsible than we ever thought we'd see-- admitting, a few months ago, that it knew for years that tobacco was addictive-- it goes and grows more responsible. PM senior vice president Steven Parrish called nicotine "a drug" this week and said, according to the New York Times, that Philip Morris was "prepared to see cigarette sales drop and to invest elsewhere the assets now spent on tobacco."

We hope they're investing fast. The Supreme Court is scheduled to rule soon on whether or not the F.D.A. has the authority to regulate tobacco. If the Court rules that the F.D.A. does have the authority and finds (or implies) that tobacco should be officially defined as a drug, then cigarettes might be regulated as drug-delivery devices and we'd have a lot of ornery smokers on our hands. Not to mention the possibility of Philip Morris Jeans, the Philip Morris Home Furnishings Collection, and PM The Fragrance.